Menopause and detachment: a path to serenity

Dear readers, if you are reading these lines, you may be going through one of the most significant transformations in your life as a woman: the menopause. This period, often presented in a negative light in our society, can nevertheless become an extraordinary opportunity for personal growth, especially when approached with the principles of detachment derived from yogic wisdom. Let me guide you through an exploration that could well change the way you look at this stage of your life.

Let’s start by deconstructing an all too common misconception: detachment is not the cold indifference we sometimes imagine it to be. In the yoga tradition, vairagya (detachment) is more like a benevolent friend who helps you step back while remaining deeply connected to your experiences. Imagine sitting by a river and observing the flow of your thoughts and emotions without letting yourself be carried away by the current. That’s true detachment.

At a time when your body is going through intense changes, this ability to observe without judgement becomes particularly valuable. Having a hot flush? Instead of fighting it or feeling overwhelmed, you learn to welcome it as a wave that will eventually pass. This approach doesn’t deny the reality of your experiences: it simply offers you a new way of experiencing them.

You may have heard of the menopause as an ‘end’ – the end of fertility, the end of youth, the end of a certain kind of femininity. But isn’t that a very simplistic view? In many traditional cultures, this period marks the entry into the age of wisdom, when women achieve a new, respected status within their community: a much more pleasant and real vision to integrate! 

The physical changes you are going through – changes in your cycle, hot flushes, sleep disturbances – can be seen as signs of a profound inner reorganisation. Your body is inviting you to slow down, to listen to yourself differently, to redefine your priorities. It’s as if nature itself is offering you an opportunity to put on a new face, to free yourself from patterns that no longer serve you.

Yoga can be your best ally during this period. Not the acrobatic yoga you sometimes see on social networks, but a gentle, adapted practice that honours the needs of your changing body. Here are a few postures that are particularly beneficial during this period:

• The child’s pose (Balasana) invites you to centre yourself and snuggle into a protective cocoon, while gentle twists massage your internal organs and release tension. 
• The legs-up-the-wall posture (Viparita Karani) is particularly calming for the nervous system, and the balancing postures anchor you in the present while reinforcing your inner stability.
• Breathing techniques (pranayama) are invaluable tools: alternate breathing can calm your mood swings, while the cooling breath (Sitali) offers natural relief from hot flushes.

By taking a few minutes each day to sit quietly, you create a sacred space for yourself. Observing your thoughts and the sensations in your body as they come and go, without trying to change them, naturally cultivates detachment and helps you to develop a new relationship with yourself. This regular practice becomes like an inner refuge, a haven of peace where you can recharge your batteries at any time.

The emotional rollercoaster of the menopause can be destabilising. One minute you’re feeling irritable, and a few minutes later melancholy and anxiety join the emotional dance. 

Yogic detachment allows you to welcome these emotional states more gently. Remember: you are not your emotions, you are the consciousness that observes them. This perspective can radically transform your experience of this period of transition.

This approach naturally extends to your relationships. Your partner, your children, your colleagues may not always understand what you’re going through. Detachment helps you communicate your needs more clearly, take others’ reactions less personally and set healthy boundaries without guilt.  It becomes possible to cultivate compassion for yourself and others, even in the most turbulent of times.

The menopause marks the beginning of a new chapter rich in possibilities. It’s the perfect time to rediscover forgotten passions, explore new interests and deepen your spiritual connection. Nourished by life experiences, your inner wisdom can finally be fully expressed. Your femininity evolves and is enriched, freed from social expectations and pre-established roles.

Daily rituals take on particular importance during this period. A relaxing bath with essential oils, a soothing herbal tea savoured with full awareness, writing in a diary or chosen moments of solitude all become opportunities to reconnect with yourself. Talking circles with other women going through the same experience can also offer invaluable support and a space for authentic sharing.

Yogic detachment invites you to see the menopause as an initiatory passage. It’s an opportunity to free yourself from limiting social expectations, the need to please at all costs, roles that no longer suit you and toxic relationship patterns. This new freedom opens the door to greater authenticity and deeper fulfilment.

The menopause combined with yogic detachment offers you a unique opportunity for transformation. It’s as if life is inviting you to undergo a great metamorphosis, like the butterfly emerging from its chrysalis. The changes you’re going through, while sometimes uncomfortable, can become the fertile ground for a new, more authentic and fulfilling chapter in your life.

Remember that every woman experiences this transition differently. There is no ‘right’ way to go through the menopause. The important thing is to find your own rhythm, honour your needs and surround yourself with caring support. Yoga and detachment offer valuable tools for this journey, but remember that you are your own best guide. Trust yourself, listen to your intuition, and above all: welcome this period as an invitation to become more fully yourself.